Grog of Substantial Whimsy (3.5e Equipment)

Author: AnimeOtaku137 (talk) Date Created: November 17, 2010 Status: Mechanically Complete Editing: Clarity edits only please

Ratings for this homebrew: Average: NA / 4  0 users favored it (4/4).  1 users liked it (3/4).  0 were neutral on it (2/4).  0 users disliked it (1/4).  0 users opposed it (0/4).

Rate this article Your rating for this article: Favor Like Neutral Dislike Oppose Submit | Cancel Discuss this article

Grog of Substantial Whimsy

Brewed from the talents of the finest senile wizards, the magic of chaotic absurdity now comes to the player at such a low price! It's mainly a tool used for adding quirks and perks to give the player's characters a little more character!

The goal was to make magical effects that neither help or improve the Character, nor majorly stunt the player's ability to play.

Market Price: 30 gp

Each grog can at max have 4 effects. If the Character gets the same effect, the effect is canceled. Character cannot have the same effect twice in each individual grog.

Grog of Substantial Whimsy

D%	Effects
1	Character is no longer affected by grog.
2	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
3	Character can Wish the death of one being, but will also die.
4	Character can access their brain by unscrewing the top of their skull.
5	Character's mouth lets out light, illuminating 5 ft. in front of the Character whenever it's open.
6	Character is unknowingly inducted into a secret society.
7	Character can speak with domestic fowl, but they tend to lie to them.
8	Character sees dead people who bother them a lot.
9	Character’s party learns the 5 minute ritual to summon the character. (Just a pentagram, nothing fancy)
10	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
11	Character can summon a demon, but only has a 10% chance of controlling it.
12	Character can resurrect once per year.
13	Character forgets how to read and write. But will also be able to cast read magic at will.
14	Character becomes a dragon in a human form with the same stats as they had before, but has forgotten how to polymorph.
15	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
16	Character can concentrate to have background music play for them. (DC 15) concentration, 1d20 rounds.
17	Character thinks magic is actually impossible, and won't accept it. Refers to it as "witchcraft" and "nonsense"
18	Character loses 1d2 feet in height, their clothes & armor amazingly still fit.
19	Character is now much more comfortable around the (un)dead than the living.
20	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes them to be soaked in lamp oil.
21	The next sword that hits the Character receives a permanent +1 bonus.
22	Character can no longer kill anything.
23	Character’s middle name becomes “Wonder Noodle” and must always say their full name when asked.
24	When Character is angry, their hair erupts into a cold flame.
25	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
26	Can exist comfortably in harsh environments for 10 minutes/day
27	Every week, the Character must sacrifice an enemy or gain a -1 penalty to all ability scores and saves, increasing by 1 every day that an enemy isn't sacrificed. A special sacrificial dagger appears in the Character's inventory and cannot be used for anything but a killing blow. It is also bound to the Character.
28	At the start of every encounter the Character must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
29	Character’s organs will never fail, even if removed.
30	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
31	Character's dream semi-manifest in reality. (Like warped trees, or obscurely built buildings. At DMs discretion)
32	Character gains Thaumaphilia, an intense fascination with magic.
33	Flowers grow out of the spots where the Character walks.
34	Character seemingly ‘walks on air’ and is permanently 5 inches above all solid surfaces.
35	Character becomes pregnant. Does not matter what sex, if any, the Character is. 01-49% = boy, 50-98% girl, 99-100% other. Will be a clone of the Character & a normal nine month pregnancy. Morning sickness & severe mood swings apply as DM sees fit.
36	One of the Character's permanent effects or injuries are cured! If they don't have one, re-roll for one.
37	Character's bones turn to wood, and can live off sunlight. When they go up an age group, they go up a size category as well as receiving the penalties of aging.
38	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
39	Can Rage 1/day (effect does not stack, roll again). Character turns green and extremely muscle-y. Character will rip through their armour making it worthless unless they get it repaired.
40	Character’s body becomes an orangutan. (no stat change)
41	Character forgets a random language.
42	Character realizes the meaning of life, but is unable to tell anyone else. They are also hunted by cults (and maybe gods) so that they won't even have the knowledge, or might have it extracted out of them.
43	Character sprouts a tree on their head. Extends lifespan x5000. Tree will grow until too heavy for person, enveloping them and taking root. Person will become immobile tree. Retains personality and speech.
44	Lung capacity enlarges harmlessly. Can hold breath for 20 minutes.
45	Roll for new god.
46	Character thinks "They" are after him. Whoever "They" are.
47	Character's face has the same properties as catnip. (A cat allergy may be included at DMs discretion)
48	Arcane markings (Explosive Runes) appear on skin permanently, cannot be removed even if the skin is.
49	Character falls madly in love with random party member. DC 25 to get over themselves, can only make save 1/month.
50	Roll twice more times on this marvelous table, and all effects affect the entire party.
51	Character becomes aware of how to process opiates and meth.
52	Character's stomach now functions similarly to a bag of holding.
53	When the Character is asleep, their consciousness leaves their body in the shape of their favourite mundane animal to fuddle about.
54	Character's shadow does not do the same thing as the Character. It is the same size, and does not leave no matter what time of day.
55	Character is haunted by nightmares of a lost island that holds extraordinarily improbable animals.
56	Colourful bubbles come out of the Character's mouth instead of words, but the words come out of the bubbles when they pop. Cannot cast spells with verbal components.
57	Character's gender switches at night. Were-gender.
58	If the Character punches an ally, they forget who the Character is.
59	Gain a racial trait of the next race you touch.
60	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
61	Character can easily climb trees like a cat, or a monkey.
62	Character develops Thaumaphobia, an intense fear of magic.
63	Wave of force emits from Character, 1d4 damage in cone in direction Character faces.
64	Character's age fluctuates ± 20 years each day.
65	Character's breath is a light flurry of snow.
66	Character cannot exit through the same way they entered.
67	Character can cast a random cantrip level spell at will.
68	Character lays an egg (regardless of gender). (What kind is DMs choice.)
69	Character no longer gives off any indication that they are alive (or undead). Is not detected by detect life or detect undead.
70	Character gains a random language.
71	If the Character hears their name, they petrify for 2d4 rounds.
72	Character's presence causes holy symbols to glow red. Including mundane ones.
73	When the Character is teleported, they cannot take any gear (clothing and equipment) with them.
74	Character gains one time use of spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
75	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
76	Fireflies swarm the Character at night, and does not gain bonus for hiding in darkness. (No penalties either)
77	Character cannot enter a room without announcing their presence
78	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
79	Character becomes soluble in rainfall. (Drinking liquids is harmless)
80	Character now owes their life to someone who won’t be born for centuries.
81	Character sprouts a 3 ft prehensile monkey tail.
82	Character perform any action without announcing their name.
83	Character does not age while asleep. Increase life span by 1/3.
84	Character teleports 1 mile; stone replica appears in his place.
85	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
86	Character's clothes change randomly when attacked. (Armour is not affected)
87	Character's breath becomes combustible.
88	Last creature killed by Character is reanimated, and hunts the Character.
89	Character becomes aware that at death, they are resurrected with opposite alignment.
90	Player becomes very talented at making whittled spoons.
91	Character realizes that the universe was born in a huge explosion. Is allowed to start religion.
92	Character can juggle anything they can lift.
93	Character becomes addicted to casting the last spell they casted, and really enjoys casting it whenever they get the chance, or an excuse.
94	Character cannot enter a building without being invited.
95	Deludes Character into believing the grog functions as indicated by a second die roll (no save).
96	Character no longer has muscles. (But can do everything without them.)
97	Everyday when the Character enters combat, Character's sweat becomes a minor water elemental. 3d6 rounds, 50% chance of being hostile. Dissipates at midnight.
98	Any liquid consumed now produces the effect of the grog to the Character.
99	Character explodes and dies, bwahahahaha. Will negates. (DC 10)
100	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
101	Character teleports to where they had visited 24 hours ago.
102	Character's touch brings wilting flowers back to life.
103	Character can cast Detect Stupid at will. (doing so might only detect the Character)
104	Character can become a mount.
105	Character becomes a dehydrated water salesmen. (just add water!) (3 sp per can)
106	Character grows cat ears, and gains a dislike of water. Character also likes fish.
107	Whenever the Character is struck with magic, the surrounding 50 ft area shifts as though it were the opposite time of day. (actual time does not change)
108	Character can expel bodily gasses as a free action from the pores of their skin, and conceal themselves within their 5 ft. square. No effect on any adjacent squares.
109	Character can explode at will, reducing HP to 0. Explosion deals 1 point of damage per hit point in a 20 ft. area. Each time reduces max HP by 2 and disintegrates any non magical possessions including armour and weapons.
110	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
111	Character can now physically relive his memories, and can take his party with him too. (does not grant additional XP, cannot die or fight in a memory)
112	Character's sneeze is now a gust of wind.
113	To Character, "Something pulls at your heart strings, you feel as though you need to give the next person you see all of your money."
114	Character's next temporary effect (other than the grog) becomes permanent (and cannot be removed).
115	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
116	Character sprouts a singing venus fly trap on their shoulder that sings when the Character is happy.
117	Casting spells now will always cause a wild surge.
118	Character gains a valve that has a coin slot attached to it. The Character can insert the valve anywhere, deposit the number of gp for a grog, and it will dispense it!
119	Doors that the Character opens sigh.
120	Whenever the Character is affected by any sort of magic, the fabled land-shark learns their current location.
121	Character gains memories of a past life of an insanely powerful epic wizard. Specifically when that epic wizard went to the future to (kill, maim, higher, talk to, have fun with, give an item to, warn, perform an action around, or spite) his future life (the Character) the next day.
122	A women walks up to the Character, and proclaims that she is the Character's wife (regardless of gender). (Children at DM's discretion.)
123	Whenever the Character sings, a wave expels out and fills the immediate 10 ft area with blossoming flowers, regardless of the Character's singing ability.
124	Character agrees with everything, even if it doesn't make sense, or is contradictory. Character’s personal beliefs are unaffected.
125	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
126	The Character slowly, painlessly, and inconveniently turns to stone from the fingers and toes inwards. 1 limb per minute turn to stone. Can be removed by a remove curse. (Or reversed with a stone to flesh.)
127	The Character suddenly becomes aware of a nearby dragon treasure horde, the only problem is that the dragon knows that the Character knows.
128	Character gains once per day use of spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
129	Character gains another personality that presents itself when the Character sleeps. (roll for alignment of other personality.)
130	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
131	Character becomes a were-unicorn.
132	Character grows a beard, 2 ft long, permanent. If it's removed in anyway, it grows back overnight.
133	Character naturally attracts bears, 60% chance of being friendly, but will not fight for him.
134	Character attracts floating animated hands. (Tend to steal possessions and hold them)
135	Character gains a halo, and will be revealed with a detect good spell, regardless of alignment or true nature.
136	Character attracts the undead and it's necromancers, friendly or not. (Usually not)
137	Character becomes animated. (Takes damage normally)
138	Character gains reoccurring amnesia for 1d6 hours at the same time each day as the time when the grog was consumed.
139	Character realizes the exact location of a particular flower that becomes the Character's newest obsession. (The flower can be magical or not.)
140	Character’s body becomes an ostrich. (no stat change, can manipulate things with feathers)
141	Character becomes a rock and roll enthusiast, and always tries to get the nearest bard to play Freebird.
142	Character becomes a hermaphroditic version of their race. (if already so, re-roll.)
143	Whenever the Character is alone, they painfully transform into an strange bird-like thing. The Character instantaneously reverts to normal if another person or creature goes near them or sees them.
144	Character won't stop talking about the old days during the war. "You don't know man, you weren't there." "This reminds me of that one time, back in Nam..."
145	Character now worships a Norse god.
146	Character's mouth becomes a set of 4 tentacles 2 ft long.
147	Character has an intense need to narrate his actions/feelings and surroundings.
148	Character can communicate feelings through physical contact.
149	Character becomes a compulsive skinny dipper. Any water they swim in is treated as holy. (or evil, depending on alignment)
150	Roll twice more on this marvelous table, and all effects affect the entire party.
151	Character becomes aware of a mundane object of his choice, and will only ever be comfortable with the object being around.
152	Whenever the Character falls more than 20 ft. they make a 6 foot whole in the ground in the shape of their body when they land. Falling damage applies normally.
153	Whenever the Character hears the laughter of children, they painfully transform into a troll, and revert when they’re struck.
154	Character’s legs are paralyzed whenever they hear someone speaking
155	Character is haunted by the ghost of their childhood saber toothed walrus.
156	Roses replace the Character's hair. They grow at the normal rate of hair, and blossom when in season, giving the Character a temporary +1 to CHA.
157	Any fires set by the Character attract the undead like moths to a flame, whether they're friendly or not. (10% of being friendly)
158	Character grows a hairy tail, 3 ft long. Objects smaller than the Character’s hand can be stored in the tail.
159	Character appears to be an old black and white cartoon.
160	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
161	Characters suffer from acute paranoia whenever they hear their name.
162	When Character strikes an enemy, they rotate 180 degrees, and are considered flatfooted the first time it happens.
163	Character finds a kitten in their pocket. The Character falls instantly in love with the kitten as though under a charm effect, no saves. Anyone who sees the kitten is distracted for 1d4 rounds, even if they've seen the kitten before. Afterwards, they make a DC 13 fortitude save or be distracted for another 1d4 rounds.
164	Character has eyes in the back of their head. Can only use one pair at a time.
165	Character apologizes profusely every time they attack and/or kill something. Will otherwise feel the same way about fighting as before the effect.
166	Character gains lycanthropy. (Were-wolf)
167	For the next 1d6 weeks, every time the Character removes any head gear, a large white rabbit appears from it. It is a normal rabbit. 01-50% Male, 51-100% Female. They will mate and produce offspring normally.
168	Character lays an egg (regardless of gender). (What kind is DMs choice.)
169	If the Character hears their name, they swap places with whoever said it.
170	Character gains a random language.
171	Character becomes severely prejudice against (DM's choice).
172	Everyone will only acknowledge the Character as a myth.
173	Character naturally attracts dire animals (DMs choice each time.) 50% of being friendly.
174	Character gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
175	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
176	Character's mouth no longer opens when they talk, but words and sounds still come out as normal.
177	Character becomes addicted to the last substance they consumed before the grog.
178	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
179	Character compulsively uses internet slangs regardless of situation. (Tea Bagging, Spawn Camping, H4X0Rz and the like)
180	Character realizes they’re an escaped slave who’s owner is tracking them.
181	Character becomes the last surviving member of an endangered species. (That strangely enough has the exact same characteristics as the race they were before the grog, other than appearance)
182	Character hears 1d4 voices in their head.
183	Character grows another set of arms.
184	Character loses their physical depth, and becomes 2 dimensional. Character's surface is always facing the observer (even if there are multiple ones). Cannot slip into cracks, and does not gain any bonuses. Whatever Character holds also becomes 2 dimensional.
185	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
186	A hat appears on the Character's head. If it is removed, another hat appears under it. There can never be a point where the Character is not wearing a hat. Each hat can be sold for 3 cp.
187	Character's finger nails dispense magical ink, and can be used to scribe spells with.
188	Roll 1d12, at that time of day, the Character emits a powerful beam of light that has no effect other than alerting absolutely everything that can see it to your presence at that moment.
189	Character gains a D20 of Destiny, which the Character can consult at-will in-game.
190	Character becomes very talented at tomfoolery.
191	Character learns recipe of random meal, gains the ingredients to prepare it, and will not be satisfied until they make the meal in a decent kitchen.
192	Character gains +30 to balance when they are completely naked. If touched with anything (including rain) the effect is negated.
193	Any object that's less than 1 pound within 10 ft of the Character begins to orbit around them. When the Character moves more than 10 ft away from the original spot of the object, they stop and return to where they were.
194	Character hiccups butterflies. 2d4 butterflies per round for 2d4 rounds when caught flatfooted (or surprised).
195	The Character’s feet cannot smell, and gets occasionally complimented for it regardless of the situation. NPCs are unaware of any compliments they give.
196	Character is able to kill stones with birds.
197	Any food the Character cooks is able to speak.
198	Any liquid consumed now produces the effect of the grog to the Character.
199	Character's brain is bombarded by stupidity. Intelligence save DC 10 or the Character's head explodes. (If Character survives, they can tell terrible jokes as a swift action, and causes sentient creatures to make a DC 17 will save or be stuck 1d4/level rounds pondering how dumb it is. Creatures are considered staggered.)
200	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
201	Everytime Character snaps their fingers, a biscuit appears before them. It's a normal biscuit. Max 1d4/lvl biscuits per day.
202	Character grows an afro that can be used as a backpack.
203	Character cannot become non-magically dirty.
204	Character's presence boils any kind of eggs if within 30 ft, no matter what. (stay away from hens)
205	Character's hands and forearms are immune to acid.
206	Character can make a DC 23 will save to grow mustache out of sheer force of will.
207	Character's neck, arms, and legs become incorporeal, but their head, hands, feet and body do not.
208	Roll for new alignment.
209	Character no longer has weight. Automatically fails bull rush and trip saves. Is otherwise unaffected. (i.e. falling damage, load carried.)
210	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
211	Next profanity used by Character becomes a living, vile entity.
212	Character believes anything shiny can be used as money.
213	Character's skull becomes diamond. (does not affect their ability to live or grow)
214	Character is allergic to the opposite gender.
215	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
216	Character's skin is burned by moonlight. 1d4 dmg/round
217	Character naturally attracts deinonychus' (raptors). 40% chance of being hungry.
218	Character can only exist in the shade. (Becomes ethereal in the sunlight, and can only move back to shade)
219	Character cannot be killed with rope.
220	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes an extremely blasphemous tattoo to appear.
221	Character's soul can leave their body and haunt any inanimate objects (weapons, lamps), but is fatigued when they return to their body.
222	Character is nourished by grass instead of food. (All other foods make them vomit.)
223	With exception to the eyes and brain, the Character begins to harmlessly decompose. (Is not undead, no longer eats)
224	Character can shoot any thin elongated object as arrows. Character takes a -4 to attack bonus when using them.
225	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
226	Character’s body parts are replaced with fake ones. (Character has an urge to go find their original body)
227	Character can summon the undead. 40% chance of controlling it. Anything summoned disappears at midnight.
228	Character is turned into an ooze the same size and shape, for 1 full hour/day. (Character's equipment becomes ooze goo, but reverts to normal when the Character does as well.)
229	Character's heart becomes clockwork. It must be wound every 24 hours or else it stops. If it stops, Character's hit points drop to -1, and are restored to full if it's rewound.
230	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
231	Character's hair becomes a very large powdered white wig. Character also gains a gavel.
232	Character teleports 1d20 years into the past, in the same spot. The same amount of years later, they walk into the bar and watch themselves disappear.
233	Character enjoys a good game of chess with only mirrors as his opponent.
234	Everyone no longer can take the Character seriously.
235	The only male name the Character is able to pronounce is Gary.
236	Character's touch can drain hit points, but loses the same amount.
237	Character is awake and alert the instant they wake up, regardless of how many hours they slept. Can also never be hungover.
238	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
239	Character becomes perverted, and stares at other character's unmentionables quite blatantly.
240	Character’s body becomes a panda. (no stat change)
241	Character attempts to devour kobolds on sight.
242	Character constantly sounds like a grandma, using the terms "pooky" and "schnookums" regardless of the situation. Character pinches cheeks too.
243	Once per day, the Character can transform a segment of wall into a door.
244	Within 5 ft of the Character is always 10 degrees colder.
245	Character now worships a Greek god.
246	Character will become addicted to the next substance they consume.
247	Character becomes a were-saxophone player.
248	Character gains devil horns, and will be revealed with a detect evil spell, regardless of alignment or true nature.
249	Character gains fangs, but not a bite attack.
250	Re-roll twice more on this marvelous table, and the effect affects entire party.
251	Gain pet rock familiar.
252	Character can speak with plants once per week. (equivalent to succeeding a Gather Information or Knowledge nature of 15 DC)
253	Character's hands double in size, and can use weapons one size category larger than the Character with no penalties.
254	Character becomes extremely trusting of a random base race.
255	Character learns to brew diet healing potions. (doesn't actually heal)
256	Character's backpack disappears, and can just pull out items from behind their back, as long as they can carry it.
257	Character can use and throw vegetables to cast bolts of magic missile. Each vegetable is one bolt. (treated as spell, not thrown object)
258	Character gains random racial feature from next race they come in contact with, that isn't the same.
259	Character grows a second head that has a separate personality.
260	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
261	Character can not exist any further away than 50 ft. of a random party member.
262	People with magic naturally distrust the Character.
263	Character's bones become unbreakeable. But will take damage normally.
264	Whenever the Character receives a critical with a weapon, the weapon breaks. (after taking damage)
265	Character's jaw splits in two, but can talk normally.
266	Character is only seen as a silhouette.
267	Every hour, Character has a 30% chance of falling asleep. Character can be woken up normally, or will otherwise sleep for 8 hours.
268	Character finds their own baby. (What kind is DMs choice.)
269	When the Character leaves the ground, they become twice as heavy. (Take twice as much fall damage)
270	Character gains a random language.
271	Character's palms and fingers become immune to fire.
272	It rains outdoors whenever the Character is sad.
273	Character passes out for 1d4 rounds whenever they cast/hit by a spell.
274	Character gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
275	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
276	If an insect comes in contact with a Character, it's size becomes the same size category of the Character, and it becomes dire.
277	The Character's eyes move together to become one big eye.
278	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
279	Character gains a Tortoise mount.
280	Character recently took an inviolable vow but can’t quite remember it. (DMs choice)
281	Character becomes a were-human. (even if they're human, they turn into a different human)
282	You come down with a nasty infection from the Solanum disease. (Zombies!)
283	2d8 of Character's teeth turn to gold. Can be sold 2 gp each. (but must yank them out first)
284	Character believes everyone is an imposter of themselves.
285	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
286	Everything in the world becomes aware of who the Character is.
287	Character gains a prehensile tongue that can extend out 5 ft.
288	Character develops an intense fear of trees; they might be treants.
289	Character can run up walls and other flat surfaces, but if they stop or change direction, they will fall.
290	Character has a remarkable knack for teaching monkeys sign language.
291	Character gains sylvan as a language.
292	Whenever the Character witnesses a spell being casted, they must succeed a DC 10 + spell level Will save or roll for a new alignment.
293	Character becomes addicted to casting the last spell they casted, and really enjoys casting it whenever they get the chance, or an excuse.
294	Character can summon doors that when opened, lead to a random plane. They, however, cannot summon the doors when in a plane other than the material plane.
295	At the start of every encounter the Character must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
296	Character's bones can be played like a xylophone.
297	Relatively shallow bodies of water split in a dry path whenever the Character walks through them.
298	Character enjoys a good meal of brains. They also gain very small memories from the brains they consume, and can make a Knowledge brains check (+10 normal DC) instead of any normal knowledge check.
299	Character's personal space collapses in on itself and implodes around the Character. Strength save DC 10 or Character is crushed. (If Character survives, Character can no longer be crushed by any circumstance.)
300	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
301	Character gives birth to a clutch of (DMs choice).
302	Character can increase the length of any hair by pulling on it.
303	Character becomes the central deity of a religious cult and gains followers. The cult can be based on anything the Character desires, (I.e. adventure, treasure, muffins...etc.)
304	Character is only nourished by alcohol. (All other foods make them vomit. Will become drunk as normal.)
305	Character's belly button can open to a 1 cubic foot pouch of holding.
306	Character's breath is always a visible smoke. (can fill a room over time)
307	Character can spend a full round action to succeed a DC 25 + HD of creature concentration check, to knock out one enemy.
308	Character is invincible to all magic, but only while asleep.
309	Character irrationally hates fungi. (stomps on them when they see them)
310	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
311	Character is knocked prone whenever they hear their name.
312	A doppelganger of the Character is instantly created 5 ft away from them. The creature pays its humble respect and wanders off to see the world.
313	Character's skin becomes pure white, and sparkles in the sunshine. Character also becomes subtly homosexual.
314	Whatever the Character says appears in words that float around their head for a little while.
315	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
316	Character loses 50 lbs.
317	Character can no longer answer a question truthfully.
318	Character will never remember their name.
319	Character’s pockets are now popular hangout spots for pocket gnomes.
320	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes birds to swoop down and groom them. (Like a crocodile)
321	Character's internal organs implode and compress into one super organ. Character looks only like skin and bones now. (is otherwise unaffected.)
322	Character shoots out fireworks (works as dancing lights) whenever they're struck.
323	Character gains a small doom cloud familiar.
324	Character's blood becomes pancake batter.
325	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
326	Character will now age backwards. (from how old they are now.)
327	Character can no longer see a random party member
328	Character's hair stands straight up as if electrically charged. It frizzes and discharges electricity. Character's handshake is shocking and static electricity sparks appear on the Character's body now and then. (Harmless, but can get annoying to be around.)
329	Character cannot fight in direct sunlight, will otherwise dodge and hide, or get out of sunlight.
330	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
331	Character becomes irrationally prejudice of a random base race.
332	Everytime the Character levels up, they have a choice of switching to a different class of the new level.
333	Character becomes a were-badger.
334	Whenever the Character witnesses a spell being casted, they must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
335	Within 5 ft of the Character is always 10 degrees hotter.
336	Character can whistle obnoxiously loudly.
337	When the Character snaps their fingers, a small scale resonance cascade occurs and summons an extra-planar creature (friendly or not) every hour for 1d4 days.
338	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
339	Character's HP is instantly (and only) reduced to 1 if struck with an holy weapon, but is healed by unholy weapons.
340	Character’s body becomes a kangaroo. (no stat change)
341	Character has a grapevine constantly growing on them.
342	Gain Eyebeams, once per day use, 1d4 + lvl. Effect stacks
343	Character is permanently dressed in a pristine Tuxedo. (Can wear armor over it)
344	Character's blood becomes a flourescent light blue, and glows in the dark.
345	Character now worships an Egyptian god.
346	Character can fly by sticking their thumbs in their armpits and flapping very hard. (Can fly a distance equal to 5 ft./strength modifier with a DC of 10 and a cumulative +3 every time after until they have taken an extended rest.)
347	The DM reacts as though the effect is something horrible, even though nothing happened.
348	Character is no longer liked, nor hated by anyone. (a reset)
349	A random party member disappears and is replaced with a map to their location.
350	Re-roll twice more on this marvelous table, and the effect affects entire party.
351	Character's ghost is always viewing the Character's own actions in the third person.
352	Character becomes a very dedicated carnivore. (Enemies look tasty)
353	Character can use brooms to fly. (poor)
354	Character becomes a super magnet. (A magnetic strength score of 10, aura 5 ft.)
355	Whenever a ranged attack misses the Character, it is considered they caught it with their teeth.
356	Whenever the Character hears their name, they are launched 5 ft in the air.
357	Character can breathe in outer space.
358	Roll a 1d12, at that time every 24 hours (pm), the Character is struck by lightning. (if outside. 1d6 damage to Character, 4d6 damage to anyone within 5ft)
359	Character is able to sit on anyone’s head as long as the head is bald. (Character becomes as light as paper when doing so)
360	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
361	Character’s hair becomes a mohawk that’s as hard as steel.
362	Character's random body part becomes invincible. (bones, organs; DMs choice.)
363	Character becomes a cannibal. (Maybe even a civil one.)
364	Character gets an amoeba familiar. (Will not multiply.)
365	Character evaporates water when they touch it.
366	A permanent image of the Character is left where they are standing right now.
367	Character is infected with Porphyric Hemophelia. (Vampirism.)
368	Character lays an egg (regardless of gender). (What kind is DMs choice.)
369	If the Character pours water on the ground, it will become quicksand.
370	Character gains a random language.
371	Character sinks in ice as if it was quicksand.
372	Whenever the Character enters a building, gravity immediately reverses orientation for them.
373	Character's teeth become precious gems, and cannot be removed while the Character is alive.
374	Character only cries blood. (Harmless)
375	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
376	Character does not have to touch objects to pick them up, but he must be in reach.
377	Character becomes extremely heterophobic, but extraordinarily attractive to the opposite gender.
378	If the Character stares at someone, they are unable to look away.
379	Character only bleeds rainbows.
380	Character sprouts a small, flaming wick atop of their head that can’t be put out. It burns brighter when they’re angry.
381	Character constantly hears the playing of a guitar in the distance. (and could be drawn to it)
382	If the Character is planted, it will grow into a tree that bears small fetus fruits that mature into babies of clones of the Character.
383	A random party member becomes infatuated with the Character.
384	Character's hands are reversed. (Like a rakshassa)
385	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
386	Character can only scry using a bald scalp.
387	Whenever the Character is struck in combat, the weapon they were hit with combusts, dealing 1d4 force damage to anyone in 5 ft. and 1 point of continual fire damage for 1d4 rounds. The weapon does not break.
388	Character's skin gains full body leopard print tattoos.
389	All of the Character's debts are paid, and they must buy a grog to who ever is next to them. (and might proceed to sing drinking songs)
390	Character has a license for wild-geese chasing. (Ever been on a wild-goose chase?)
391	Character learns recipe of random meal, gains the ingredients to prepare it, and will not be satisfied until they make the meal in a decent kitchen.
392	Character has an extreme distaste for thieves and pirates.
393	The grog pours out of the Character's mouth back into the mug, refusing to be drank by the Character. (needs new potion)
394	Character's hair grows to touch the ground, and can be used as an arm.
395	Character is pulled into the earth where they were standing until only their head shows, and must be dug up.
396	Character does not sink in water.
397	Character's hair bears fruit during harvest season.
398	Character can become gaseous in direct sunlight. (Equipment can't)
399	Character's internal organs become extremely unstable and explode. Fort negates (DC 10) or the Character dies. (If Character survives, Character evolves past the need of their organs.)
400	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
401	Character's eyes become removable pearls, retain normal sight.
402	Character is no longer able to sit or lay down.
403	Character can swim up waterfalls.
404	Character can inscribe markings into stone with their fingers.
405	Character is poisoned. (DMs choice of poison)
406	Character's eye sockets become pitch black. Character can see normally.
407	Any facial hair the Character has becomes self-aware.
408	Character can animate their own shoes to dance, but not while they're being worn.
409	Any water drank by the Character is instantly purified.
410	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
411	Character becomes best friends with the current president of the United States.
412	Character ages 100 years, and has 100 years added on to their natural life span.
413	Character can walk on clouds. (Getting to them is a different problem)
414	Character must make a DC 19 Will save or become wracked with existential angst.
415	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
416	Character must make a DC 15 fortitude save, or gain a second personality.
417	Character's body is covered with fire like an everburning torch. (No harm to Character)
418	Character gains a voodoo doll of them self.
419	Character realizes they have died centuries ago, and doesn’t know how they’re here now.
420	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a random limb to fall off. (Can be re-attached easily)
421	Character turns to stone for 1d4 hours whenever someone makes eye contact with them.
422	Character gains a permanent twitch.
423	When Character walks over a spot where someone died, they instantly know where it was.
424	The next thing the Character sits on will be able to fly. (poor)
425	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
426	Character can cast any spell that's casted on them, once. Effect does not stack.
427	Character's mouth can open to twice it's normal size.
428	Character fails all diplomacy checks with the opposite gender.
429	Character can turn whatever they kill into small fist sized trophies.
430	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
431	Whenever the character falls they will always land on their face. (This includes jumping)
432	Character's hair becomes a hedgehog familiar. Hair grows back at normal rate.
433	When the Character's blood leaves the Character, it floats around like wax inside a lava lamp.
434	Character turns invisible when eyes are closed. Does not affect clothing.
435	Character no longer has a face, but can talk, eat, see, hear, and smell normally.
436	Any animal the Character touches will speak common for 1d4 + lvl hours.
437	Character's feet become hands. (+5 to climb when bare 'foot')
438	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
439	Whenever the Character takes damage, they are immediately shoved 10ft. from wherever they received it from.
440	Character’s body becomes an octopus. (no stat change, does not require water)
441	As long as the Character lives, a far off demon lord cannot return to life. (might be attacked by demon minions!)
442	Character knows the Wis score of any creature they encounter.
443	Any liquid the Character consumes becomes alcoholic. Character is also more immune to dehydration than most.
444	Character's skeleton removes itself from the Character's body without killing them, and runs away. It takes 24 hours for a new one to grow back. The skeleton is the same alignment as the Character, but has no desire to become friends with them.
445	Character now worships an oriental god.
446	Character's skeleton glows a fluorescent red that's visible through their skin.
447	Character cannot see the undead.
448	Character moves and falls normally underwater, but only if completely submerged. (Character will still have to hold their breath.)
449	Character's skin becomes soot black.
450	Re-roll twice more on this marvelous table, and the effect affects entire party.
451	Character gains an aura of disagreement.
452	Character can impregnate any species. The offspring will be the impregnated species.
453	Character becomes best friends with the Grim Reaper. (They cannot ask for favors.)
454	Fruit sings if within 30 ft of the Character.
455	Whenever a Character enters a building for the first time, it will eject him forcefully.
456	Character becomes a were-tree.
457	Character is able to spell and scribe any word they hear in any alphabet. (Whether they understand it or not is a different matter)
458	Character can summon pillows at will, and they are extra fluffy. Character can summon at max one pillow per person in their party.
459	Character can swim in lava, but is still burned by normal/magical fire. If Character fails a swim check while in lava, they explode and melt horribly.
460	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
461	Whenever the Character closes their eyes, they see the place where they used to live. It would be a shame if it burned down or something....hehehe...
462	Character can move statues as though they were opposable.
463	Character loses all hair on their body.
464	Character can read books by flipping through them.
465	Character is burned by the touch of the opposite gender.
466	Whatever the Character touches has to agree with them, but can still physically resist them.
467	Character is only nourished by the souls of who they slay. (All other foods make them vomit.)
468	Character lays an egg (regardless of gender). (What kind is DMs choice.)
469	Character tastes like chocolate.
470	Character gains a random language.
471	Any plant the Character plants will grow in one day, but will never blossom or bear fruits or vegetables until it normally would anyway.
472	Character attracts kobolds.
473	Character learns one mundane song that they can play on any instrument.
474	Character gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
475	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
476	Character can no longer use outhouses to go to the bathroom.
477	Character's soul cannot leave the material plane.
478	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
479	Character's tears are acidic. The Character is not burned by them.
480	Character suffers intense pain whenever they enter a temple or church, regardless of the deity.
481	Character will possess whatever kills them for 1d8+lvl days.
482	The next enemy the Character meets will become friendly, but only to the Character.
483	Every fruit the Character touches turns to glass.
484	Character now has commitment issues.
485	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
486	Character will win every coin flip they do.
487	Character can bring anything they've killed back to life. It will become permanently hostile to the Character regardless. (Character cannot gain experience this way)
488	Any creature the Character kills evaporates. (Not equipment)
489	Any change in HP of the Character floats away as numbers when it happens.
490	Character is a champion pillow fighter. (but only with pillows)
491	Character's urine can revive plant life.
492	The Character is now burned by cold, and frostbitten by fire.
493	Character becomes addicted to casting the last spell they casted, and really enjoys casting it whenever they get the chance, or an excuse.
494	Character now speaks in bad action movie one-liners.
495	Character can crack open any kind of nut or seed in their hand.
496	No ship can float while the Character is on board, however, they can be sailed underwater.
497	Character can set water on fire.
498	Character's hair becomes porcupine quills.
499	If the Character fails a DC 10 Reflex save, every molecule in the Character's body is exploded at the speed of light in every direction. (If Character survives, Character becomes a huge power source for any electrical equipment, regardless if there is any.)
500	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
501	Character gives birth to a brood of (DMs choice).
502	Character glows a shade of gold in the presence of magic, and magical ore.
503	Characters eyes never close.
504	Character can use carrots as daggers.
505	Character's tongue becomes a harmless snake, and talk normally.
506	Character's urine is extremely acidic. (does not harm Character)
507	Character falls in love with the next enemy they see.
508	Everytime the Character whistles, an eagle will swoop down and land on the Character's shoulder, and stare at whatever the Character stares at. It leaves if the Character enters combat.
509	Character believes the next humanoid they see is their son and/or daughter and/or other.
510	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
511	Character gains a political committee designed to elect the Character to a fictional political office.
512	Character's skin turns red when it's hot, and blue when it's cold.
513	Character is haunted by the ghost of everything they slay.
514	It is always assumed that the Character killed their parents. (Whether or not it's true)
515	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
516	Character's pockets has an unending supply of Cuban cigars. Cannot be sold. (Only given away graciously)
517	Character is only able to enter rooms through dramatic actions.
518	Character attracts insects.
519	Character always appears to be riddled with bullet holes. (Does not bleed from holes)
520	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes an anvil to chain itself to the Character’s leg. (Break DC 17)
521	The next wild mundane animal the Character sees, becomes domesticated to the Character.
522	Character gains the profession Air Guitar skill. By strumming the air, the noises of a guitar are created. Character may attempt to dazzle and stun anyone within range of his voice with a wicked guitar solo as a full round action. Fortitude save DC 10 + Character's Air Guitar skill bonus.
523	Character can only hear their base language backwards.
524	Character's presence causes frost to form, but won't freeze anything.
525	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
526	Character gains a new hairstyle every day.
527	Character is attracted to them self.
528	Character grows fur on their entire body.
529	Character glows an eerie green for 3 seconds when their bellybuttons are pressed.
530	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
531	Character can only communicate by saying their name over and over, and the party are the only ones who understand them. This includes past and future party members.
532	No matter what the Character says, anyone who hears them will think they are attempting to seduce them.
533	Character is intensely afraid of prostitutes.
534	Whenever the Character witnesses a spell being casted, they must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
535	Character is extremely flexible, to an inhuman point.
536	Character gains a permanent twitch.
537	Character can use weapons as musical instruments.
538	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
539	Doors attack the Character if they attempt to walk through them. (Wood: +3 1d6+2 smash attack. Metal: +3 2d6+3 smash attack. Stone: +2 2d8+4 smash attack.)
540	Character’s head becomes that of a velociraptor. (gains bite attack)
541	Character has a powerful urge to punt anything in the tiny size category or smaller.
542	Character gains opposable feet.
543	Character's sweat releases an eerie blue smoke.
544	Character's eyes become similar to an octopus, and can see underwater perfectly for 60 ft.
545	Character makes their own god up and worships it. (It also exists due to it being worshiped.)
546	Character gains were-obesity.
547	Character is no longer able to reproduce in any way.
548	Magical items are drawn to the Character like a powerful magnet and activate once they hit the Character. (Reflex DC 15 to avoid setting them off)
549	Character's nose glows blue when they pass near underground wells of water.
550	Re-roll twice more on this marvelous table, and the effect affects entire party.
551	Character has a 10% chance of impregnating any creature with a normal grapple.
552	Character gains OCD.
553	Character can digest bones.
554	Character grows animal horns. (DMs choice of moose, rams, etc.)
555	Any mount ridden by the Character suffers no fatigue while they ride it.
556	Character gains own shadow as familiar. (see shadow monster)
557	Character becomes chronically pooped on by anything that flies.
558	Character's nails fall off, and can be planted to grow any type of flower the Character wants. (Instantly)
559	Character can shoot spider webs out from their fingertips when outside of combat.
560	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
561	Character gains a permanent pair of glasses.
562	Character can remove any curse, by only receiving it them self.
563	Character can melt non-magical ice with their touch. They do not give off any extra heat.
564	All liquids the Character consumes become caffeinated.
565	Character can make a DC 15 Concentration check to summon the nearest bird, friendly or not.
566	Character's feet becomes invincible, but they can still feel pain.
567	Character becomes physically attracted to weapons.
568	Character lays an egg (regardless of gender). (What kind is DMs choice.)
569	Character becomes feral when their food is at stake.
570	Character gains a random language.
571	Character gains antennae on their head.
572	When the Character is drunk, they can succeed a DC 17 fortitude save to release a stream of fire with a mighty burp. 10 ft line, 1d4 fire damage.
573	Character becomes physically attracted to mundane animals.
574	Character gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
575	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
576	Character is physically teleported to alternate planes in their sleep, but return to the material plane when they wake up.
577	Character harbors an extreme distaste for sailors.
578	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
579	Character's voice of reason becomes an invincible squirrel that no one else can see.
580	Character grows a ponytail of feathers all the colour of the rainbow. It makes for wonderful plumage.
581	A bright round sphere looking object appears over the Character's head whenever they get an idea, or remember something.
582	The next enemy the Character meets becomes directly related to the Character, 40% chance of being friendly.
583	The entire party is pulled into the Character's dreams whenever the Character is asleep.
584	Character's hair becomes smoke.
585	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
586	Character's hair becomes a chicken that insists on sitting on their head. The chicken is immune to damage, and does not leave the Character's head.
587	Whenever it rains, the Character is always at the end of the rainbow.
588	Character can only communicate with cat noises. (Character can talk normally to any feline)
589	Character mistakes every woman they meet for the first time as their farming wife Charlotte.
590	Character is able to dig graves with surprising amounts of gusto.
591	Character can make a DC 15 Concentration check to summon the nearest bird, friendly or not.
592	The Character's evil twin from a parallel dimension materializes next to them.
593	Character gains a gambling addiction, and has magically bad luck.
594	Every night, an intelligent woodchuck appears to tell the Character stories as they fall asleep.
595	Character can use arrows without a bow. Instead they throw them. Use the stats of a short bow.
596	Vines grow over the Character whenever they're asleep.
597	Character permanently smells like a fresh ocean breeze. People might reminisce about their romantic experiences on beaches or boats.
598	Character's head becomes incorporeal. (Can speak normally)
599	A Boeing 747 commercial airliner crashes on the Character, and everyone needs to make a Reflex save DC 15 or be obliterated in the debris. (If the Character survives, they learn how to pilot airplanes! Too bad the only one just crashed. DMs Choice as to what the plane's cargo was.)
600	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
601	Only the top half of the Character is visible.
602	Character's touch leaves permanent black marks on any type of skin, except for their own. They also become great skin artists.
603	Character can grow herbs on themselves harmlessly.
604	Once per day, the Character can grant one mundane animal an INT score equal to their own, that goes away at midnight.
605	Character's hair grows 3x quicker now.
606	Character's fingers become a key ingredient to making a brew that can cure any and all diseases and poisons, magical or otherwise. Character is aware of the recipe. 1 finger per brew.
607	Character grows 1d4 extra fingers on both of their hands.
608	Character becomes homophobic, but becomes extraordinarily attractive to members of the same gender.
609	Character can swap places with one party member at-will.
610	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
611	Character finds a dagger in their boot. (A +1 Dagger of Substantial Importance!)
612	Character can only pee upon other people's legs.
613	The next enemy the Character attacks becomes their reoccurring arch enemy that will plot dastardly schemes to destroy the Character and take over the world!
614	Character's belly button can open to a 1 cubic foot pouch of holding.
615	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
616	Character learns the spell Teach Esperanto, which will automatically teach Esperanto to the subject. Can cast at-will.
617	Character gains an un-summonable glacier familiar.
618	Next profanity used by Character becomes a living, vile entity.
619	Any mundane creature the Character hugs becomes a plush doll version of itself for the duration the Character hugging it. (the animal cannot be harmed while plush)
620	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes it to snow in the immediate area.
621	Whatever the Character kills harmlessly explodes and splatters everywhere. (People, doors, etc.)
622	Whenever the Character wakes up, they are in a coffin where they had went to sleep.
623	The Character can only speak in their base language backwards.
624	Character gets strange blisters that pop like bubble wrap on their arms. When they pop, they make different musical notes. They're not unsightly, just weird.
625	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
626	Character's joints are reversible.
627	Character becomes violently ill when alcohol is consumed, but also becomes an alcoholic.
628	Character can remember their name, and that's about it.
629	Character becomes a witch, and might encounter witch hunters.
630	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
631	Character can use fruits as musical instruments.
632	Character's hair turns white in the presence of magic. (If it's white to begin with, it turns a girly pink, complete with bows and ribbons.)
633	Character's twin shows up, and is similar in every aspect except that their alignment is one step above or below the Characters.
634	Character is sexually attracted to fire.
635	Character is believed to be a doomsday weapon. (May be sought after by kings and nations.)
636	When the Character sleeps, the grass either grows in 160 sq ft area around the Character, or the existing grass grows ten times it's normal size.
637	Character's pockets spawn mundane playing cards one at a time.
638	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
639	Character gains a key that can open their chest cavity harmlessly like a cabinet door.
640	Character’s body turns into a troglodyte. (no stat change)
641	Character can dance with bears, whether they're hostile or not. Character must make a Wisdom save DC 10 + bear's HD.
642	A bottomless well is created next to the Character.
643	Whatever object the Character sits on can be piloted. (Fly, 30 ft. poor.)
644	When Character touches glass, they move through it like water. (Glass reforms.)
645	Character now worships an Egyptian god.
646	Character can store spells in their fingernails.
647	Character gains an aura of incredulity. Everything the Character does seems incredulous.
648	Character gains the knowledge of how to weaponize the grog, by imbuing it into a rod of wonder. The effects have a 50% chance of affecting the Character, or the target.
649	Character's eyebrows grow twice their size and permanently cover the Character's eyes.
650	Re-roll twice more on this marvelous table, and the effect affects entire party.
651	Whenever the Character is struck, a mundane creature will appear in their clothing. (rabbits, snakes, birds, etc.)
652	Character is detected by Detect Undead.
653	Character is constantly mistaken for an extremely evil demon.
654	Wildlife brings the Character food periodically.
655	Character didn’t actually exist prior to drinking this grog.
656	Character's touch leaves permanent red blood splatter.
657	Character can hear the thoughts of a random party member.
658	Character has random manias of superb mathematical genius, but after 1d4 rounds, won't be able to understand what they had just said or done. During the mania, the Character's brain doubles harmlessly in size.
659	Character is a were-construct.
660	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
661	Character's weapons are permanently bound to them.
662	An owlbear appears, runs toward the Character and hugs them for 1d4 rounds before disappearing. It automatically succeeds on its touch attack and all grapple checks. It attacks anyone who tries to harm the Character it is hugging. This happens at the same time everyday. Even if the bear is in combat, it will still disappear after 1d4 rounds.
663	Whenever the Character sleeps, a bed of cabbages grows under them over night.
664	It snows whenever the Character is sad.
665	When the Character snaps their fingers, a apple appears before them. It's a normal apple. Max 1d4/lvl per day.
666	A furious demon portal is opened up directly in front of the Character, and a monster of unspeakable horror named Howard suddenly sparks into existence.
667	Character can teleport from the bottom of any freshwater lake to the bottom of any other freshwater lake.
668	Character lays an egg (regardless of gender). (What kind is DMs choice.)
669	Character's jaw becomes removable.
670	Character gains a random language.
671	Character receives mail from a long distance significant other periodically by Marvin the Mailman. (He's a mailman)
672	Character is extremely prejudice against fruits and vegetables.
673	Character gains an Easter Island head familiar. When it's summoned, it sits there and creeps everyone out.
674	Character gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
675	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
676	Character can steal one prepared spell from grappled spell casters that doesn't exceed their Int modifier.
677	Character's thumb turns greens, and can cause plants to grow at a rapid rate, but cannot exceed their normal size.
678	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
679	Character can remove their face like a mask.
680	Character’s heart will never stop beating, even if removed.
681	Character thinks any form of eating meat is a crime against nature.
682	Character's mouth is stuck in a permanent smile.
683	Character's right arm is interchangeable with any other creature's right arm. (Character can remove right arms harmlessly)
684	Character grows an extra finger and toe on each hand and foot. (No effect if Character lacks hands and feet.)
685	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
686	Character can speak the language of the next mundane animal they meet.
687	Character is able to shove their foot up any butt, regardless if it fits or not. It deals pride damage.
688	Character only requires sleep 1d8 hours of sleep a night. (Re-roll every night)
689	Anything the Character wears turns to wood permanently, but retains all stats.
690	Character has an unusually good talent for trout tickling. (May be illegal in some areas.)
691	Character knows the Int score of any creature they encounter.
692	Character can use a baguette as a longsword.
693	Character becomes addicted to casting the last spell they casted, and really enjoys casting it whenever they get the chance, or an excuse.
694	Character is no longer able to get drunk.
695	Character physically regresses to when they were a child, but retains all stats and abilities.
696	Character can snap their fingers together and produce sparks like flint and steel would.
697	Character gains a second heart, and is able to hold their breath for 5-6 minutes before suffocating.
698	Character disappears and is replaced with a map to their location.
699	Character spontaneously ages 10,000 years. Fort save DC 10 or the Character disintegrates. (Character reverts to normal health and stats before the potion, but is still 10,000 years older. Lifespan continues as normal.)
700	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
701	Character gives birth to a nest of (DMs choice).
702	Character gains insect like wings, and can fly. (poor)
703	Character gains 5 ft of height, but is not considered a size category larger. Stats don't change.
704	Character believes that all other races other than their own are aliens.
705	Character can use and throw fruit to cast bolts of magic missile. Each fruit is one bolt. (treated as spell, not thrown object)
706	Whenever the Character goes to the bathroom, small, harmless earthquakes hit the surrounding area.
707	Everytime the Character sneezes, an exact duplicate of themselves appears at least 20 ft away from the Character for 1d4 hours. Character must designate a mundane allergen that makes them sneeze. (Certain flowers, dust, mold, animals, etc.)
708	Character has a zipper on the front of their chest that they can unzip and show off the inside of their torso.
709	The next time the Character dies, they are resurrected as the race that killed them.
710	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
711	Character's shadow smokes as if it's on fire. (Not good to stay in enclosed spaces)
712	Any statue resembling an animal that is within 30 ft of the Character is animated. If it goes beyond 30 ft, it ceases to be animated.
713	Character can use wildlife as weapons. (but will drop in alignment when they do)
714	Character only bleeds sand.
715	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
716	Character's voice drops an octave and echoes no matter what.
717	Character gains cat pupils, whiskers, and fur. (No low-light vision is gained, Character might tend to purr)
718	Character's skin becomes translucent, and observers are able to see tiny fish swimming around inside of the Character.
719	Character gains a spirit animal that appears whenever the Character is within 15 ft of fire. (DM’s Choice)
720	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes plant life to over grow in the immediate area.
721	Character's tears turn into jellybeans.
722	All fire that burns within 30 ft. of the Character turns the colour of their choice.
723	Any object the Character successfully breaks bursts into flower petals.
724	Character gains 100 lbs.
725	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
726	Character knows the market value of any humanoid as a slave that they see.
727	Character attracts floating candles.
728	Character's eyes turn purple and gains an aura of purple. Anyone who is within 5 ft of the Character, including the Character, only sees in shades of purple.
729	Everytime the Character attacks a mundane animal, a second one appears next to it.
730	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
731	Any fruit the Character touches becomes dried and preserved.
732	Character gains very dramatic looking battle scars and gains a +10 on all bluff checks if only relating to them.
733	Character becomes a ghost when they are in the rain.
734	Whenever the Character witnesses a spell being casted, they must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
735	Character goes insane. They are convinced that they are nothing but constructs in a game played by unseen beings who determine their every move. They will babble incessantly about things like "stats" and "hit points". On the bright side, they gain an uncanny insight into the vulnerabilities and strengths of creatures they encounter. Effect lasts until the next time the Character sleeps. This experience stays with them forever.
736	Character gains 1d4 more eyes.
737	A talking rainbow unicorn offers to be the Character's steed. (Unicorn is Neutral Good)
738	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
739	Whenever the Character is left alone in a building, the building burns down.
740	Character’s body turns into a medium-sized praying mantis. (no stat change)
741	Character can pick up flames in their hands. (like, scooping up fire and throwing it.)
742	When the Character dies, their ghost will haunt the party forever.
743	Character gains a pair of sunglasses that when worn, they become "too cool" for whatever action is decided. Does not effect hostilities.
744	Character cannot die in their sleep.
745	Character now worships an Greek god.
746	Character's hands never leave their sleeves. (Character also permanently wears long sleeve shirts.)
747	Character becomes aware of a certain group of people who've managed to travel back in time. (No one in particular, it's DMs choice really)
748	With a DC 15 search check, the Character can find random dinosaur plushies hidden in the environment. They're worthless, but they have strange sentimental value.
749	Whatever the Character is sitting on right now becomes their property.
750	Re-roll twice more on this marvelous table, and the effect affects entire party.
751	Whenever the Character hears their name, a random flower sprouts somewhere on their person.
752	Character's presence causes vegetables within 30 ft. to sing.
753	Character gets accepted into the University of their choice.
754	Character's left arms swaps with the last humanoid they touched.
755	Character finds a compelling but incomprehensible magical tome in their inventory.
756	Character has a giant round hole in their chest. (Harmless)
757	Character's footsteps sound as though they were 3 size categories larger.
758	Character gains a locked bulletproof suitcase that's permanently chained to their left wrist. (Contains some very powerful information, too bad no known locksmith can open it)
759	Character permanently speaks Spanish, but gets subtitles.
760	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
761	Character becomes a were-zombie. (If already a zombie, they become were-alive.)
762	Character now feels the need to route out the communists.
763	Character is now permanently afflicted with glitter.
764	Character will always smell like freshly baked cookies. Might attract wildlife.
765	Character gains a permanent smiley face button on their shoulder.
766	Character is cloned, but doesn't know where the clone is.
767	Character goes down one size category. (With no Ability Score change)
768	Character lays an egg (regardless of gender). (What kind is DMs choice.)
769	Character gains very well defined and shiny muscles, and can show them off as a free action. (Does not affect CHA or CHA based skills)
770	Character gains a random language.
771	Character gets a small unicorn horn that glistens in the sunlight. (Cannot attack with it, too small)
772	Character's feet attract snakes. 10% chance of being poisonous.
773	Whatever the Character kills becomes a tombstone.
774	Character gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
775	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
776	Character attracts suspicious little red glowing dots. (Like a sniper...)
777	Character gains a butterfly familiar. (The Character doesn't know it's their familiar though)
778	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
779	If the Character falls in love (truly), then whoever they love will mysteriously and spontaneously combust the next day.
780	To only the Character, puddles are always 10 ft. deep.
781	Character gains a pencil-thin mustache, a thick British accent, and an urge to lift one eyebrow.
782	Spectacular lightning strikes flares overhead when the Character's name is said.
783	Character looks like a ghost in the moonlight.
784	Character can make a normal swim check to swim through the ground. (Like getting to underground places) Failing the check results in entombment.
785	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
786	Character's whistle sounds like a contrabass saxophone.
787	Character can boils small quantities of water by staring at it for 1d6 rounds.
788	Character invents the Harpmonicsicordiphone.
789	Character breathes out harmless lightning clouds. Can shock/distract people.
790	Character has what it takes to be an Olympic-level vagrant.
791	Character goes down one size category.
792	When Character is submerged in the ocean, they transform into a blue whale. They must beach themselves to turn back. Their equipment expands to fit them.
793	Character's hair becomes as strong as steel.
794	Character no longer has a midsection. (Still eats normally)
795	At the start of every encounter the Character must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
796	Character gains their own brain as their familiar. It can exist harmlessly outside of their body.
797	Character can breathe beneath only 5 ft. of water.
798	Character attracts whatever they are afraid of.
799	All of the Character's blood is replaced with grog. Constitution save DC 10, or be obliterated into the chaotic omnicosm. (If Character survives, they re-roll and decuple (x10) the effect!)
800	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
801	Character petrifies all grass they walk on.
802	Whenever the Character leaves the ground, they become as heavy as paper. (Will fall normally though)
803	Character becomes intensely afraid of penguins. (Sphenisciphobia) (Penguins are not unknown to stalk people)
804	Character is nourished by charcoal instead of food. (Food harmlessly burns in their mouth while they chew, can not be used to bite.)
805	Character can pull their hand off, revealing a dagger attached outwards from their wrist. Their hand functions normally when sheathed and not.
806	Character can make a DC 15 Concentration check to summon the nearest bird, friendly or not.
807	Whenever the Character makes a fist, they become round spheres of steel. (Dmg 1d6 + Str.)
808	Character begins to lactate ale regardless of gender.
809	Whenever the Character takes damage, they must make a DC 13 Fortitude save or fall unconscious for 1d4 rounds.
810	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party.
811	Character is surrounded constantly by a personal 'bubble'. When it pops, it takes 2 rounds to reform.
812	Sand perpetually pours out of the Character's eye sockets when their eyes are open. Character sees normally.
813	A random limb becomes only the functioning skeleton of it.
814	Character can summon small versions of themselves that sit on their shoulders and argue with each other or other people.
815	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
816	Character's burp becomes the mating call of unicorns.
817	Character becomes discretely stalked by a garden gnome.
818	Character's nose bleeds when anything venereal is discussed.
819	Doors will always hit the Character on the ass on the way out. (Tougher doors hit harder)
820	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes water nearby to become holy/unholy. (Depending on alignment)
821	Character is no longer related to anyone.
822	Character's blood harmlessly becomes sand.
823	Character's presence causes animals within 30 ft. to sing.
824	Once per day, the Character becomes encased in stone. DC 13 Strength to break out.
825	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
826	Whenever the Character makes a joke, a laugh track plays in the background.
827	Character's HP is instantly (and only) reduced to 1 if struck with an unholy weapon, but is healed by holy weapons.
828	Character perspires rainbows.
829	Any door the Character tries to open instantly locks itself. (Can still be picked)
830	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
831	Whenever the Character falls asleep, their clothes fly away and migrate south for the winter.
832	Anything the Character kills is personally escorted to hell by the Grim Reaper.
833	Character is now healed by mushrooms. (1d4 + Con modifier per shroom)
834	Character sprouts a singing venus fly trap on their shoulder that sings when the Character is happy.
835	Character is blinded, but can still see normally through sonic vibrations. (See Daredevil)
836	As long as the Character pets a creature, it is able to speak it’s mind.
837	Character gains 3 fox tails.
838	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
839	Character's butt dispenses 10 ft. of rope per day.
840	Character’s body is permanently covered in mummy wraps. (no stat change, preserve body upon death)
841	Character can skip themselves off of water (10 ft.) with a DC 5 jump check, with each successive skip increasing the DC by 5.
842	Character sings manly songs whenever they're in combat.
843	Character becomes a were-sword.
844	A random party member can now hear the Character's thoughts.
845	Character now worships a Norse god.
846	Anything the Character kills becomes preserved forever.
847	If the Character touches a plant, it glows in the dark.
848	Character's right index finger (or equivalent) gives off a harmless red laser.
849	The souls of whoever the Character kills linger around them in the form of small heatless balls of purple-ish fire.
850	Re-roll twice more on this marvelous table, and the effect affects entire party.
851	Character gains a wombat for a mount.
852	Every time the Character is struck on the head with any force, they change to the opposite alignment.
853	Character releases extremely manly pheromones, regardless of gender.
854	Character's body hair is replaced with 3 leafed clovers. (Search check for a four leafed)
855	Character comes upon an invincible key that explodes anytime it is inserted into a lock.
856	Character no longer blinks, and always looks very angry. They only close when they're asleep.
857	Character can run across water, but if they stop or change direction, they sink.
858	Character's eyes are permanently covered with shadow, and are impossible to see under any light.
859	Character chooses an obscure food product. They become professionals in cooking it.
860	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
861	Character can spawn a bag of marbles every day, that only they are able to touch. If Character loses the marbles, they take a -8 penalty to Int until they are collected, or a new bag is spawned. The bag disappears at the end of the day.
862	Character now has green, copper based blood.
863	Character does not cast a shadow.
864	A 60 ft wide snowstorm surrounds the Character for 1d4 hours every 2 days at noon.
865	Character is unable to talk around the opposite gender.
866	Any weapon the Character holds is able to talk, and is normally very eager to do so.
867	Character learns recipe of random meal, gains the ingredients to prepare it, and will not be satisfied until they make the meal in a decent kitchen.
868	Character finds their own baby. (What kind is DMs choice.)
869	Character gains a grand piano familiar. (Summonable at-will, at ground level)
870	Character gains a random language.
871	People with magic are physically attracted to the Character.
872	Character becomes a were-statue.
873	Continual fog empties out of the Character's ankles filling a 30 ft radius. 1 ft high.
874	Character gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
875	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
876	Character can use wildlife as musical instruments.
877	Character can chop non-magical wood with their bare hands.
878	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
879	Character gains 1d4 different voices that they can use interchangeably at-will.
880	Mysterious runes are visible on the Character’s skin in the moonlight.
881	Character becomes unnaturally fascinated with piercing their body piercings. (Can be replaced with magical ones)
882	Character's head can rotate 360 degrees around.
883	Character's brain becomes clockwork, and must be wound every 24 hours. Otherwise Character's INT drops to 0 until it's wound again.
884	Character can make a DC 15 fortitude check to cough up one lung. It grows back after 24 hours, until then, Character cannot run.
885	Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
886	Whenever the Character goes to sleep, they are kidnapped for the amount of time they rest. After which they are returned to the exact same spot, fully rested.
887	Around the Character, the moon appears to be constantly full at night.
888	Character hiccups bubbles. 2d4 bubbles per round for 2d4 rounds when caught flatfooted (or surprised).
889	Character is nourished by arguments. All other food makes the Character nauseous.
890	Character is a professionally bad dancer.
891	Character flips a coin to decide whether or not they should tell the truth. (Heads = truth, Tails = false)
892	Character can only read and write languages they do not know how to speak.
893	Character becomes addicted to casting the last spell they casted, and really enjoys casting it whenever they get the chance, or an excuse.
894	Character occasionally and inexplicably becomes in possession of random people's underwear.
895	At the start of every encounter the Character must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
896	Character can sheath any type of sword in their forearm, and not be hindered in their movement.
897	Character gains a purple thumb that causes non-magical plants to whither and die.
898	As long as the Character has throwing knives, they can inexplicably pull them out of any where on their person.
899	Character fades into an existential quandary filled with angst and self-loathing. DC 10 Wisdom save, or the Character vanishes into nothingness. (If the Character survives, they will never complain about how bad things are, and will be persistently optimistic.)
900	Roll three more times on this marvelous table, and take all the effects.
901	Character gives birth to a litter of (DMs choice).
902	Character's head is removable. It will remain active, as well as the body.
903	Character gains a talking tattoo. Roll for tattoo's alignment.
904	Character is able to lick an enemy to paralyze them for 1d6 rounds. Fortitude save DC 10 + Character's level negates.
905	Everytime the Character dances, a natural disaster happens somewhere. (2% chance it happens right where the Character is)
906	Character's consciousness swaps with a future incarnation from the 21st century. (No stat change)
907	Character can now directly communicate with their god, but cannot get help from them.
908	Character can identify any substance by ingesting it.
909	Character is burned by water, except when they drink it.
910	Roll again, and the effect affects entire party, and is twice as strong.
911	From now on, whenever the Character meets a new person, the new person will only ever be able to dream about the Character.
912	Whatever the Character guesses will always be correct, but no one will ever believe them.
913	Character is able to be used as a great club by other characters in the same size category. Character takes half damage minus their armor bonus.
914	Character becomes a dragon in a human form with the same stats as they had before, but has forgotten how to polymorph.
915	Roll again, the effect is thrice as strong. (Thrice as fast, thrice as much, etc.)
916	It's now impossible to identify the race and gender of the Character. (May be referred to as a 'whatever')
917	Character is made of felt. (But takes all damage normally)
918	If the Character succeeds a DC 20 Wisdom save, the Character can marry any two creatures who automatically become non-violent towards each other, and produce a child hybrid.
919	Character grows 1d10 new and mysterious organs in his abdomen.
920	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes all nearby wildlife to double in size.
921	Character's singing attracts hostile creatures.
922	If the Character opens a closet, there will always be a dead body in it.
923	Character's middle name becomes "Danger".
924	Character can shoot anything with a bow that they can lift.
925	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
926	Whoever makes eye contact with the Character cannot help but laugh.
927	Character gains rock-star like groupies that follow them everywhere. (Large mob) If they get killed, new ones take their place. They are only capable of cheering and trampling the Character.
928	Character can plane shift once per day, and move 5 spaces before coming back to the material plane. They have a 60% chance of bringing something back with them, and a 20% chance of it being friendly.
929	Character is severely allergic to intimacy. (Symptoms include head trauma and internal bleeding)
930	Roll again, the next living thing the Character touches also receives the effect.
931	If the Character succeeds a DC 17 Wisdom check, they can cause any living creature to become a virgin again.
932	Character is abducted by aliens, probed, surgically implanted with an unknown alien device, and is put back in the same spot about 10 minutes later.
933	Beneath the Character's skin, they become entirely robotic. They take damage and die normally, and don't feel any different.
934	Whenever the Character witnesses a spell being casted, they must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
935	If the Character breaks a window, it sucks everything through it as though the other side was a vacuum.
936	Once per day, the Character can summon a stream of 600 butterflies to swarm themself for 1d4 rounds, blinding everyone including the Character within 40 ft. until they're dispersed.
937	Character learns every recipe there is to cooking and serving the slain bodies of their enemies.
938	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
939	Character adds all ranks from Move Silently to Bluff, and instead says, "You can't see me, I'm hiding." for any and all sneak attempts.
940	Character’s body turns into a medium sized minotaur. (no stat change)
941	Character becomes a dimensional rift that alternate realities can enter through.
942	Character is possessed by a demon that acts the exact same way as the Character did beforehand. The demon is detected by Detect Evil, but is the same alignment of the Character.
943	Character can only exists in the material plane when the sun is up.
944	Once per day, the Character can vomit freshly caught fish.
945	Character does not believe in gods.
946	All Gods abandoned the Character.
947	Character's consciousness visits the modern era in their dreams, by taking the body of a future incarnation.
948	Character is abducted by aliens for 1d4 days. (DMs choice of what happens)
949	Character has a 30 ft aura of a full-moon. (Affects were-creatures)
950	Re-roll twice more on this marvelous table, and the effect affects entire party.
951	The Aurora Borealis are always above the Character.
952	Character is a were-warforged.
953	A giant robot from the future comes back in time and stands over where the Character is standing. Character could never possibly hope to be trained in piloting it though.
954	The Character is considered dead for the duration they sleep. When they wake up, they are resurrected.
955	Character finds a notebook detailing the way they were built in a lab.
956	Instead of sleeping, the Character is under the effects of internally produced lysergic acid diethylamide for the amount of hours they would normally spend sleeping.
957	Character becomes married to the sea. If Character already has a spouse, they will kill them and become a sailor. (Doesn't leave the party)
958	Character goes up one size category. (With no Ability Score change)
959	Character can make a DC 17 Will Save to grow a fabulous and amazing mustache.
960	Any casted magic that affects the Character causes a wild surge.
961	Character can make a DC 13 Strength check to punch into the ground and pull out any type of vegetable.
962	Character's presence causes bubbles to explode. 2d4 fire damage each.
963	Character ceases to age, but will die at the end of their lifespan.
964	Whenever the Character is cold or freezing, they become undead. When they are warmed up again, they come back to life.
965	Character's fingers grow twice as long.
966	Character becomes aware of a contract they have with the mole people to defile any gardens they happen to pass by. (Farms don't count, petunia bushes do)
967	Character's long lost fraternal twin will visit the Character soon.
968	Character lays an egg (regardless of gender). (What kind is DMs choice.)
969	Character degenerates into an earlier form of their race. (No stat change)
970	Character gains a random language.
971	Character can no longer speak unless they are touching someone, and can only speak in the languages of the person they are touching.
972	Character becomes permanently drunk.
973	Character has an aura of badass-itude.
974	Character gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
975	Character gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
976	Whatever the Character kills will come back to life as a zombie immediately. 50% of being friendly. All creatures die permanently at midnight the day they were raised.
977	Character ascends to a higher dimension, learns how to exist in this dimension, and then instantly pops back into the material plane with no memory of the event. (May have made friends, or enemies in their time)
978	Character can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
979	The name and face of everyone the Character kills is automatically tattooed to their skin when they die.
980	Tomorrow, Character will save the life of whom fate has decreed must die.
981	All of the Character's criticals and fumbles are twice as effective as they normally were.
982	Character explosively sheds their skin once a month, starting now. (2d6 force/fire damage, 10 ft. radius)
983	Character's urine morphs trees into treants. They won't be happy you peed on them.
984	Character can swallow ores and defecate the refined material.
985	Roll again, the effect is thrice as strong. (Thrice as long, thrice as much, etc.)
986	Character can make a DC 10 + Animal's HD Will Save to make mundane animals fall unconscious.
987	Character reproduces by budding. (Still needs a mate)
988	Character can summon a magical gong at will and hit it for whatever reason they feel like. The gong doesn't do anything because it's a gong.
989	Character's only mode of transportation is the moon walk.
990	Character receives their diploma in Dilly-Dallying from the College of Substantial Whimsy.
991	Character has an hardcore aura. Everything they do is pretty hardcore.
992	The absolute most crazy and absurd things will happen to the party, but only when the Character isn't around.
993	Character can store normal sized ships in bottles.
994	Character is detected by any Detect spell.
995	Nothing happens. (What are the odds?)
996	The Character is aware that the next time they die, they bursts into flames destroying all flammable gear and is resurrected.
997	Character becomes best friends with an epic wizard that only ever comes around to ask for loans of money to fund his/her crazy ideas.
998	Character's left arm falls off, and is replaced with an incorporeal 'Karma Arm'. (If a creature has less hp than the Character has levels, the Character can make a touch attack to instantly kill the creature.)
999	Character's mind is blown. DC 30 Class Level save or their minds explode from realizing the answer to the universe. If they succeed, they gain their ranks equal to their class level in Knowledge (everything) checks.
1000/0	Character is divided by zero.

---

Back to Main Page → 3.5e Homebrew → Equipment